Sunday, July 19, 2015

Frum Writing

I feel like I can categorize frum writing into 2:

The first is mainstream, Mishpacha* style - It is idealistic. Details are omitted because they don't want to offend anyone. Don't get me wrong, it can be very inspiring, if you let it. They want to take you to 100, but if you're not starting already at 50, you'll never get there.

I remember, some years ago, reading about a couple - was it in Israel? - who had given birth to their first child, a special needs child (perhaps it was even Spina Bifida, but I don't recall). They went on to have another baby, who was also born with special needs. But this next part I remember clearly, though the quote isn't word for word, "The couple realized that they couldn't have healthy children, and so they decided to adopt special needs children and create a home where they could thrive." Without skipping a beat, the article went on to talk about the amazing things this inspiring couple does.

I got a little hung up on, "THE COUPLE REALIZED THAT THEY COULDN'T HAVE HEALTHY CHILDREN." Where's the emotional turmoil? Was this, um, DIFFICULT for them? Where's the... angst?! I guess that's not what the article was about, and that's fine. I can only speak for myself. Their journey towards understanding and accepting this reality would have been more appealing to me than all the fluff about more great Jews who are malachim; above and beyond.

It IS wonderful to see how there is no shortage of great Jews doing great and amazing things. But as a growing person, I value the journeyi: The inner struggles, the victories, and the setbacks. Don't glaze over the pain. It is a big part of what gives our lives meaning. 

But seeing as I'm so biased with regards to special needs, that wasn't the best example of what I'm talking about.

"Preparing for Pesach" inspiration is a better example. Most of that writing is contrived garbage, and the best part about it is that it's by men who 'just show up.' I could write pages of complaints about Pesach prep. But the right thing for me to do would be to delete it all, and then just write something positive and inspiring - or if I couldn't do that, just delete it all, period. The latter would get me more points in shamayim, it's true. The latter type of writing style is the one everyone uses because it's the right one.

Man.

The 2nd category are the OTD** (or borderline OTD) writers. They let it all hang out. They are the polar opposite of mainstream, just as they intend to be. Such as Frum Satire.

I'm not really a writer. I'm not even a blogger. I don't even know what I'm doing here! But since I'm typing these things out, I'll just say that I do know that I need to stay in the white and write what's right, even if it annoys me. I wish I could at least be close enough to the line to reach people who are at 0. Or -100. But I still need to be in the white. That's just how it is.

Wishing you all of Hashem's open brachas in perfect abundance,
Rivka Devora

*Mainstream orthodox Jewish magazine
**"Off the Derech," people who used to be orthodox Jews, and then dropped out.

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